February 9th

golf-ballThe tension headache is starting to ease this morning. It now only feels like I have a golf ball lodged between my skull and my brain. I got over ninety minutes of sleep last night, which is an improvement. I still have no idea what is causing the headache. Perhaps it was the coffee. I didn’t think it was that strong.

I noticed that while I was drinking that coffee, I hadn’t once performed a stock check on my office supplies. Notably, my paperclip stock pile is dangerously low. I only have 27 paperclips remaining of the non-stippled design and four of the stippled design. I shall issue a requisition form for more. As discussed earlier, the stippled design holds the pages better, but they also snap easily. I don’t wish to be injured by potentially dangerous paperclip shrapnel.

I had two dreams last night. In one I was drinking a tepid glass of water. That was the whole dream. In the other dream I had no arms or legs and I was forced to bathe by rubbing myself against a sponge glued to the inside of the shower. My dream-shower took a long time and made me late for work. Not real work – dream-work. The dream stopped before I left my house so I don’t know how I was able to function at my job under those circumstances, let alone drink coffee.

Dorothy stopped by the office today. She stood by the door, smiled and waved at me. She had a bow in her hair. I waved back, tried to smile and stopped when she gave me a concerned look. I said nothing. I didn’t know what to say. I felt a burning feeling in my chest and my mind sort of shut down. She said quickly “Okay, well, I’ll come back another time,” and walked away.

My headache returned immediately, maintaining at a golf ball sized pain, which is good.

November 27th

Paperclip-01_xndr

Sometimes I have to make difficult and important decisions.

Today I decided to remain with the paperclip of standard size and design. The ones with little gripper lines are not only prone to breaking, but are also quite dangerous too and snap into tiny pieces. This happened to me during a filing related accident and a fragment of paperclip became lodged in my palm. I was not able to remove the fragment and eventually my skin healed over it.

I wondered if this meant I wouldn’t be able to pass through a metal detector at an airport, but then considered the likelihood of me flying in an airplane, and I concluded my concern was unnecessary.

I tried explaining the reasoning of my paperclip decision to my colleagues. After I had finished talking, Bob looked at me for a long time, blinked a few times and then slowly turned back to his screen. I feel he understands the gravity of my decision.

I’m not sure how I feel about Bob’s coffee, it doesn’t wake me up, in fact, quite the opposite. Today I watched the second-hand on my watch for thirty five minutes until someone asked me if I was okay, and I said that actually, yes, I was, and I meant it. I may have smiled, but I can’t be certain.

I felt quite relaxed today, which is unusual. I considered walking a different way home. I didn’t actually do it, but I thought about it.